My first Period Abroad

Part 1 of “My First Period Abroad”

Setting the Stage

Once in Korea, I got to spend a week with other ex-pats from all over the globe. We were put up in a hotel for orientation.  Jet-lagged, we spent our sleepless evenings and nights exploring a certain aspect of Korea; theme bars, karaoke rooms, cheap alcohol and 3L pitchers of beer.  The alcohol of choice was Soju. At just over a dollar in CAD per bottle, the Saki like substance became a preference for liberating one’s inhibitions and letting loose. I made many friends this week and it set the stage for the year to come.

(more…) “My first Period Abroad”

A Year’s Worth of Tampons, Please.

Part 1: A Period Abroad

Desperate for something different, at the end of my undergrad degree, I decided to spend a year abroad teaching English in South Korea.

Going Away Gifts

As my departure drew near, my loved ones inquired as to what they could gift me as a going away present. I concluded what I needed most was Tampons. I needed to bring with me, a years’ supply as I had not met, nor began my relationship with the diva cup. In my prior research of life in Korea, I learned that North Americans did not like the choice of period products available. The forums I consulted concluded the products available to be too small and too fragrant.

I had a horrible visual of a small, bloodied, but pretty smelling tampon falling out of me, or causing a yeast infection and I wouldn’t know how to acquire treatment for. That was enough to ignite the amassing of tampons.

(more…) “A Year’s Worth of Tampons, Please.”

The Take Over

It was mid morning, and I was brainstorming strategy with my department at work. I was contributing and feeling confident. These meetings inspire me to revise my methods, try something new and hit the ground running. They re-instill meaning and purpose behind the job that I am doing. I really like these meetings.  They are a refreshing change from my normal day to day.

Out of no-where, my stomach began to hurt. Breakfast wasn’t sitting easy, I concluded as I continued to be an active part of the day. The pain continued to radiate upwards towards my shoulders, and downwards into my pelvic floor and suddenly, I felt like my hips were broken and my back seized up. The idea of being able to walk out of the room with any ounce of dignity was out of the question.  The pain created a home in my torso where it festered and burned.  If I stood up, I would have felt as if my pelvis might just fall off. My body began to shake and all I could think about is the pain.  

(more…) “The Take Over”

When I was Younger, I Wish I Knew That…

  • At the end of the day, your underwear will always look like someone sneezed in it. It’s normal. That’s called discharge and it’s your vagina’s self-cleaning system
  • Labia’s of all sizes are normal. They are a form of protection, like the lips on your face.  If another person is excited to get in your pants, they’re not going to care what yours looks like.  If they have any negative concerns at all, dump them
  • All the uterus bearing people in your life, from friends, teachers, aunts, moms, grandparents, etc. either have or are menstruating. They know the ups, the downs and what you’re going through. It’s okay to ask questions and you shouldn’t be ashamed to do so
  • If a sex partner does not want to wear a condom/ protection and argues some weird reason for it, such as “I don’t like the way it feels.” Dump them.
  • Period diarrhea is a thing. The same thing that causes your muscles to contract to push out your uterine lining can also cause you to poop more. Fun times!
(more…) “When I was Younger, I Wish I Knew That…”

How I Dumped My Endocrinologist or How I Kick Started My Period When Nothing Else Worked

Hello, dear constant reader/bleeder:

My name is Emma and I hereby allow The Wrath Mother to share my story with you to enlighten you and satisfy your curiosity.

I had my first period the summer of my 12th year.

The morning it happened I thought I was dying. It felt to me like a scene straight out of Carrie (which I was not even old enough to be familiar with, but as an older adolescent I felt seen in her humiliation and rage).

(more…) “How I Dumped My Endocrinologist or How I Kick Started My Period When Nothing Else Worked”

An Oversimplified Calculation of How Long We Bleed (and Don’t Die)

Using the information from helloclue.com, and not taking into account birth control taking, smoking, stressors, pregnancies, birthing or any other life-ing that can alter the length of a cycle, I am going to crunch some numbers and produce for you, my over simplified rough estimation of how long we actually menstruate.

(more…) “An Oversimplified Calculation of How Long We Bleed (and Don’t Die)”

An Introduction

My relationship with my period has been unhealthy, often riddled with embarrassment, shame and the fear of a perpetual blood patch between my bum cheeks.

It’s been twenty something years that we have been together, and still it surprises me on the monthly. Sometimes it’s volatile, with floods of blood overflowing my diva cup accompanied by disabling cramps, while other times, it shows up without warning and disappears before I have even realized its arrival.  Still, it’s a constant in my life.

If you have ever shed uterine lining, you may know what I’m talking about.  You, my dear reader are not alone, yet somehow it seems as if the world implies that we are. It feels like, at least in my society, that menstruation is taboo.  The ability to talk about periods as a regular life occurrence seems restricted, or rather hushed.  It’s not apart of the conversation, yet, my colleagues can talk about the colour of their child’s defecation at our lunch table (which I find is much grosser).  So, go figure.

(more…) “An Introduction”